blessed

Listening to: Hold Me Near by Enter the Worship Circle

The ways I procrastinated before writing this post: Put it off till the next day. Determined today was the day. Sat down. Checked my Facebook. Texted my best friend. Made some coffee. Had a heart-to-heart with my mom about my future. Lamented. Checked my Facebook again. Changed my profile picture. Went to the bathroom. Put my coffee in the microwave. Went to go find my battery charger. Decided what picture to use with this post. Played with my dog. Checked my email. Looked at the website for the missionary training school I'm going to next year. Prayed. Prayed some more. Wondered why love has to be so complicated. Realized medication would benefit me greatly. Yawned. Laughed hysterically with my sister for no good reason. Went to get my coffee out of the microwave. Wiped the counter. Sat back down. Realized how very much I'm going to miss my family while I'm abroad. Looked through all the pictures I've edited. Pondered why people stab you in the back. Realized yet again that my Lovedar never fails. Walked around the kitchen. Did a jig. Decided to write this post. RIGHT NOW. Wrote some. Went to bed. Decreed that if anyone should read this all the way through, I would give them a hug.

     Let me begin by saying, I have a terrible procrastination issue. Terrible. And I'm sure you had no clue...
    
     Now that my confession is out of the way...on to bigger and better things! Like Jesus. He's the best :) And He never ceases to amaze me.
   
     I mean really? I'm entirely wayyyy too blessed. I could ramble on and on and on and on. And you know...I think I will! Because this is my post and I'll ramble if I want to! *sung to the tune "It's My Party" while doing yet another jig*

     Firstly, I have come to realize what amazing, beautiful, caring, hysterical friends I have. Becca, Shemia, Kacey, and Lisa are my girls. My 24/7, authentic, legit, faithful friends. I have so many more people that I love but these four are my core group. I talk to them every day. And they know what's up if you know what I mean.
 
     Becca has been awarded the title BFF because she's awesome. She. Just. Rocks. She's the kind of person who would do anything for anybody. And I swear, I've never heard her complain. She is patient, hilarious, makes me want to be a better person and best of all...she's a GINGER! Have I ever told you about my deep, undying love for gingers? NO?!

     Brace yourselves...

     I STINKING LOVE THEM!

     I would love my dear Becca whether or not she was a ginger, but she gets extra points for it.

     Anyway, that girl is my rock. We have laughed until we cried and cried until we laughed. She knows my deepest, darkest secrets and STILL loves me. She gets a cookie...HECK! A lifetime supply of cookies for that! She is absolutely gorgeous and has the biggest heart. She's my Heart Sister. :) We plan on being medical missionaries together and living in a hut. It will be grand! I could go on, but most of the reasons I love her are not blog appropriate. So...moving on! ;)

     Shemia.

     Need I say more? No? But I will anyway! She's an amazing woman who is always seeking a deeper understanding of and relationship with God. And inspires me to do so as well. We have impromptu Bible studies on a regular basis...in the office at work...in the middle of dinner dates...on Skype. And I love her for it. She's always willing to drop everything and listen, and that's the kind of person I strive to be. Also, this woman has *amazing* storytelling skills. For seriously. In fact, I'm going to gift wrap one of her stories and send it to all of you on a rainy day.

    Ahhhh...on to Kacey. I don't even remember how our friendship became what is today, but I am SO grateful for her. We talk everyday after work and help each other de-stress. She and I can talk for hours and never say anything of worth. And yet other times, we have the deepest, most encouraging conversations. She always has something positive and uplifting to say.

     Kacey is so silly...and reminds me what an important part of life that is. And she's a brilliant photographer! Brilliant!

    And then there's my Lisy :) She is not only one of my best friends...but she's also the best younger-than-me aunt a girl could ask for! She's been around since forever and I consider her more of a sister than anything. She's absolutely beautiful and has the BEST sense of humor. Ever. She can make me laugh so hard that my abs cry for mercy!

     Have you ever seen Sense and Sensibility? Maryanne and Elinor are perfect depictions of Lisa and I. Perfect. As a matter of fact, we are quite certain that BBC has been following us around. I smell espionage!

     She also, is a super talented photographer! We have picture editing all-nighters, heart-to-hearts, pity parties, girl weekends, chocolate fests, and giggle fits as often as we possibly can. And they are fabulous!

     Honestly though, the one thing about all of them that I love and appreciate the most is their deep, unswerving, devoted love for Jesus. They express it in their own unique ways and I grow more as a result of it.

     "Secondly" is going to have to wait for another post...it happens to be time for an editing party/giggle filled night with Lisa and my little sister Danae!

Beccas, Shemias, Kaceys and Lisas...they make it ridiculously fabulous :)

sunrise

Listening to: The Coldest Heart -The Classic Crime
Reading: Self Incrimination -Randy Singer

This night has been so long
And so full of pain
I've been hurting
And begging You to explain

I'm no longer saying "if"
You've taught me instead to say "when"
As I ask for strength
Until the light comes again

This night has been so long
I've been praying for it's end
God, You're ever-faithful
I know You'll bring the sunrise again

I've cried lots of tears
And been so confused
My heart has been
Thrown around and abused

But You're bringing me the warm sunrise
And You're healing my pain
I'm feeling a peace
That I just can't explain

I cry out to God
He bends down to hear my prayer
He's my protective shade
What reason have I to be scared?
                 

i'll be fine

Listening to: Faint Not by Jenny & Tyler
Has the overwhelming urge to: Name something Ramses

My head spins, my knees give way
Simply at the thought of you
I'm so ready and yet so afraid
And there's nothing you can do...

But maybe it's in this fear
It'll be the easiest to understand love
Then again...
Will love be enough?

After all it was "love"
That let me down
"Love" that left me here
Crying on this cold, hard ground.

I'm trying not to see him
When I look into your eyes
But it's hard to hear the truth
After giving in to the lies

No matter what I say
Never let me go
I need you here
No matter how little I let it show

We have years to undo, Baby
But don't ever give up on me
At the end of it all
You'll get my best, you'll see

I'm trying not to blame you
For his mistakes
But Baby this is so hard
When I feel my heart is at stake

You couldn't save me then
But God's on my side
Even though you couldn't stop it
He holds the tears I've cried

So don't worry about me
Baby, don't worry about me
I'll be fine.

musings

Listening to: Postcard From Paris -The Band Perry
Proverbs 14:10 Each heart knows it's own bitterness and no one else can share its joy.

I seriously had an internal battle about whether or not to post this picture because it's yet to be edited. I think I need to be heavily medicated. Either that or I just need photoshop back! Rawr! However, I think it's still quite lovely in all of its unedited glory :) Minus the fuzz at the top left corner of the flower. But you know, whatever.

      I must apologize. To all of my dear lovelies I convinced to join this time-consuming blogging hobby, I realize I have not blogged in eight years and twelve days. I vow to try keeping this bad boy up and rolling.

     

     HOW-ever! I do not come to you empty-handed. My excuse is...well...I've had nothing worthwhile to say. And I'm still not positive that I do. But we'll see what comes of this last minute chaos. It just might be magical! (I'm not making any promises as far as that last statement is concerned.)

    I've been at a loss for words lately. Hmm. That's a lie. I've been at a loss for words that one would consider posting on their blog for people they know and who have high expectations of them to see. If that makes any sense whatsoever. 

    And that's precisely why I'm awake at this unreasonable hour even though I have to go to work tomorrow. And also, because I don't want to be asleep. But that's a different story. Anyway, I'm awake and I just now finished a pitiful excuse for a handout for the girls Bible study I lead with my best friend. The study's topic is True Beauty. Nuff said. 

    Including all the different aspects of beauty, what it truly means, and recognizing it in ourselves is proving to be quite difficult! But I suppose it's in these times, where we have to rely on God and His Spirit to lead us because we have no words, that His faithfulness and strength prevail. I'm all for Him prevailing! 

    If I remember, I'll let you know how it all turns out.

     But I wouldn't count on another update anytime soon unless I'm suddenly overcome with motivation. Not very likely, in case you're wondering. Not. At. All. 

    On a higher note, I'm done with high school! Yay for Kimberly! And up until last week, I totally forgot that when you graduate, you get graduation presents! I tried to get the link for my snazzy laptop to hitch a ride with "graduation presents" up there ^ so you could see his glorious face and help me decide what my new boyfriend's name should be. But it didn't work :( 

    I'm debating between Fitzwilliam, Magellan, and Jafar.

    Anyway, my aunt and uncle are most generously contributing to the easing of my load in college. Laptops are heavenly. Also, this means that where I go, Photoshop goes! 

     *jumpy claps* 

     On second thought...this could be a very bad thing. I can totally see myself editing the mess out of some brick wall while my philosophy professor rambles about Gandhi. I've always preferred brick walls to Gandhi.

    I've been reading this great book lately...talk about challenging and thought-provoking! Exactly what I've been searching for since I was told Crazy Love by Francis Chan was going to blow my mind. My mind never once felt even the slightest breeze. Tough? Yes. But true nonetheless.

     Radical is phenomenal! 

*Kimberly's Bucket List*

~ Go to Office Depot

~ Use "radical" and "phenomenal" in the same sentence

~ Become a missionary in some remote jungle where a click dialect thrives

~ Bake an \Oreo INSIDE a chocolate chip cookie

*and so on and so forth*

    It's all about being a radical follower of Jesus...not being content with religion...taking His words literally...giving up EVERYTHING for Him. 

     For His cause. For His kingdom. For His glory. 

     This should be a no-brainer for us Christians. Why would we hold back from God the very things He's given to us? None of it is truly ours. And even if we could somehow claim that...what could possibly be more important to us than the Forgiver of our sins? The Redeemer of our souls? The Savior Who took on our judgment?

    Think about it. 

   See what I mean? There are some things in life I treasure...but none more than my Jesus. But do we really live like He's the most important? Is He our priority? 

     In Matthew 13:44 Jesus said, “The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field." 


     If you found some great treasure...all non-materialism aside...would you go sell what you had to buy the field it was hidden in for much less than the cost of the treasure? I'll answer for you: Heck to the yes!


    But how many of us are willing to go sell everything we have for the Kingdom of God? For something we can't see but we "know" is there. We sure don't live our faith sometimes, eh? 


    See what I mean?! Thought. Provoking. 

     Go buy this book. And a snazzy new pen and a cool-colored highlighter. Then, when you're done reading it, let me know what you think. When I finish, I'm praying about using Radical Together by the same author for my girl's LIFT (Living In Fellowship Together) group. I'll let you know about that too ;)


    Well now, that wasn't so bad was it? *talking to herself* 


    You know, not in the least! I should do this more often! *answering herself*


     Yes you should! *realizes at this point, she should stop talking about this being heavily medicated jazz, and actually become heavily medicated*


     I'm praying that all you beauties have a great week! 

                                                                                              ~Kimberly


                                                                                        

   

    

roots

Listening to: The Gospel ~Jimmy Needham

Trying desparately: Not to lose my mind amongst all of these carboard boxes. Which is proving to be quite difficult.



 I'm sitting on my couch...surveying the masses of cardboard boxes...wondering how I found myself here and not unpacking. Procrastination. Isn't it a wonderful thing?  

 Not really...because the longer my stuff stays hidden away, the longer I'm going to feel like I have no home. 

 *deep sigh*

 There's always tomorrow...

 I guess I should be used to moving by now...and for the most part I really am. I don't get all nostalgic when I leave one place to go to another...it just takes a while for the new place to feel comfortable, you know?

 I'm fairly certain all the moving I've done is preparing me for my future as a nomad and that makes it somewhat better...somewhat.

 God has certainly blessed me through all of this and I'm thankful for His provision...I just don't know how far down I'm going to let my roots grow this time. Lately, I've been thinking that perhaps God's plan will always entail moving.

 At first, this revelation kind of stung. I dream about setling down and owning a cute-sy little cottage, planting a flower garden and going to visit my best friend who would most definitely live next door.  But I also have this deep desire to travel and share the love of Christ wherever He leads me. To go love on people...heal their bodies...fill their souls with truth and with hope.

 Thankfully, God is where my roots are down deep. And He's always with me because He's in me. So I'm ok with not having a permanent physical dwelling place...because as long as I'm in His will He's my safety, my comfort and all that's farmiliar when I'm in need of the calm.

 And I know wherever He leads me, I'll be ok. He'll give me the strength to handle it all. :)

i miss

Listening to: Love Wins -Robbie Seay Band

Reading: The Horse and His Boy -C.S. Lewis

I miss Davish.

I miss Mr. Eric yelling "Get in the van man! Get on the bus Gus!" anytime we left the hotel. I miss crying. I miss seeing my kids everyday. I miss singing "Be Glorified" seven times a day.I miss praying with strangers. I miss street witnessing. I miss Kasey being next door. I miss seeing my brothers and sisters cast themselves aside for the sake of the cross. I miss the drama makeup that made us all breakout.

I miss yellow fanta.

I miss Friendship's fried chicken. I miss dancing with Brother Joe in his van to his worship cd. I miss Mr. Phillip's hugs. I miss my roomies. I miss listening and singing along to JJ Heller with Amber every morning. I miss that Thursday night. I miss Joel's piranha stories.

I miss "King of The Hill."

I miss Jared and Maggie. I miss Brother Lloyd. I miss singing in the van because there was no radio. I miss the "Nathanael" pose. I miss going to Kacey's room, having our club meetings, and eating Doritos and chocolate while NOT spilling coke on Hattie and Chambray's bed.

I miss Hattie and Chambray talks.

I miss calling Crystal just so she would have a phone call. I miss missing home. I miss not wanting to come home. I miss Ashley's "scream laugh." I miss acting like I hated Mao. I miss duct tape. I miss saying, "Dang, my dad WAS right!" every ten minutes or so. I miss changing 8 times a day because it was so hot.

I miss chanting "I. Am. Beautiful." in front of the mirror with Amber every morning and being late to every meal.

I miss Brodie's. I miss "Hey Carrissa." I miss being an adult. I miss hearing the kids say, "Sweets? Sweets?" and holding out their hands for candy. I miss last-minute Bible studies. I miss going to Christin's room and talking about underwear.

I miss not caring what we looked like.

I miss feeling. I miss not understanding Mr. Dennis's jokes. I miss bargaining in the market. I miss being the hug giver. I miss talking about how nasty the food was and what I was going to eat when I got home. I miss the little boy at the special needs school who raised his arms and sang along during "Alleluia."  I miss Josh not being able to handle me being upset with him.

I miss being in love.

I miss boat rides. I miss accents. I miss watching the woman in the pink dress dance. I miss seeing everybody worship so freely. I miss Ms. Nancy giving us all copious amounts of acidophiles. I miss sunscreen. I miss holding and praying over the kids.

I miss Belize.

babies, boxes, best friends & brides

Listening to: Everything Jesus Culture!!!
About to: Make a photography blog with the lovely Lisa you know from http://www.nutcakeinanutshell.blogspot.com/

My sweet little nephew :)



 On Monday, February 28th, 7 lbs 12oz and 20 1/2 inches of precious was born!!! My little baby nephew, Coda is the most beautiful little person I have ever seen...and I am *NOT* being bias. It's the truth! I was telling Micah how crazy it is how much love I feel for that little boy already.

 I was getting all emotional thinking about how this baby is going to be grown before I know it and will be graduating high school and getting married and there's nothing I can do to prolong his childhood...As though he were my kid!! I am suffering from baby fever I think.

 I am just so in awe of God in all of this...He knit that precious little boy in Amber's womb! And knows all about his little personality already! I'm praying great things for that little boy and his parents who I love and consider family. They are so dear to my heart and I'm so excited about the wonderful things God has in store for them and their beautiful little family :)

 I'm sure you're done listening to me be all "Ooshy-goo!!!! It's a baby!!!" So I'll move on...

                                                             *sighs deeply*

 My friends, it's time for mind-boggling messes, endless to-do lists and the smell of cardboard boxes...that's right, I'm MOVING!!! And I'm very excited about it. We have a FIREPLACE!!! I think that's what I'm most excited about if we're going to be completely honest here. :) 

 But for serious, God is blessing my family and I am so thankful for His provision and faithfulness. 

 *tangent* I love love love jello!!! It has to be one of my most favorite things in the world...and every time I eat it I can't help but exclaim, "You're never gonna be jello!" And feel a little bit more like the lovely Julia Roberts. *end of tangent*

 ALSO! My lovely friend, Ashlea is getting married in sixteen days! I'm so excited for her and her love, Scott...they are absolutely adorable! Here we are at her Bridal Shower :)

 And my aunt Lisa rocks.

 I apparently have a guest blogger...

 And my best friend is going away to college...sadness of the heart. My best friend is the most beautiful, most encouraging person. I can't imagine life without her and the thought of her being hours away makes me want to throw a fit. But for the sake of her future, I'm coping. I know that she's coming back...in fact, we have plans to go on medical missions, get an apartment, and raise our babies as best friends!!! I know this isn't permanent and that's the only thing that makes it better. I love you Becca! And am working on the post that I am dedicating entirely to you. Tehe :)

Here is my lovely!

 I'm sitting here pondering all the change that's coming...and how scared I am of change. On top of all the change that's happening in the lives of the people I love, I've been offered a job and I'll be starting college this fall...Scary stuff! Especially considering I'm still seeking God and His will in all of this. I don't know how I feel about growing up...it's nerve wrecking. I'm having to make decisions and hope and pray they're the right ones. However,  God is my constant and I know He's always with me. I'm so thankful that He is.

 Well, I have a photography blog to create so I hope you lovelies are experiencing the great love of God this week as much as I am :)