Thursday, May 26, 2011

i'll be fine

Listening to: Faint Not by Jenny & Tyler
Has the overwhelming urge to: Name something Ramses







My head spins, my knees give way
Simply at the thought of you
I'm so ready and yet so afraid
And there's nothing you can do...

But maybe it's in this fear
It'll be the easiest to understand love
Then again...
Will love be enough?

After all it was "love"
That let me down
"Love" that left me here
Crying on this cold, hard ground.

I'm trying not to see him
When I look into your eyes
But it's hard to hear the truth
After giving in to the lies

No matter what I say
Never let me go
I need you here
No matter how little I let it show

We have years to undo, Baby
But don't ever give up on me
At the end of it all
You'll get my best, you'll see

I'm trying not to blame you
For his mistakes
But Baby this is so hard
When I feel my heart is at stake

You couldn't save me then
But God's on my side
Even though you couldn't stop it
He holds the tears I've cried

So don't worry about me
Baby, don't worry about me
I'll be fine.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

musings

Listening to: Postcard From Paris -The Band Perry
Proverbs 14:10 Each heart knows it's own bitterness and no one else can share its joy.


I seriously had an internal battle about whether or not to post this picture because it's yet to be edited. I think I need to be heavily medicated. Either that or I just need photoshop back! Rawr! However, I think it's still quite lovely in all of its unedited glory :) Minus the fuzz at the top left corner of the flower. But you know, whatever.


      I must apologize. To all of my dear lovelies I convinced to join this time-consuming blogging hobby, I realize I have not blogged in eight years and twelve days. I vow to try keeping this bad boy up and rolling.
     
     HOW-ever! I do not come to you empty-handed. My excuse is...well...I've had nothing worthwhile to say. And I'm still not positive that I do. But we'll see what comes of this last minute chaos. It just might be magical! (I'm not making any promises as far as that last statement is concerned.)

    I've been at a loss for words lately. Hmm. That's a lie. I've been at a loss for words that one would consider posting on their blog for people they know and who have high expectations of them to see. If that makes any sense whatsoever. 

    And that's precisely why I'm awake at this unreasonable hour even though I have to go to work tomorrow. And also, because I don't want to be asleep. But that's a different story. Anyway, I'm awake and I just now finished a pitiful excuse for a handout for the girls Bible study I lead with my best friend. The study's topic is True Beauty. Nuff said. 

    Including all the different aspects of beauty, what it truly means, and recognizing it in ourselves is proving to be quite difficult! But I suppose it's in these times, where we have to rely on God and His Spirit to lead us because we have no words, that His faithfulness and strength prevail. I'm all for Him prevailing! 

    If I remember, I'll let you know how it all turns out.

     But I wouldn't count on another update anytime soon unless I'm suddenly overcome with motivation. Not very likely, in case you're wondering. Not. At. All. 

    On a higher note, I'm done with high school! Yay for Kimberly! And up until last week, I totally forgot that when you graduate, you get graduation presents! I tried to get the link for my snazzy laptop to hitch a ride with "graduation presents" up there ^ so you could see his glorious face and help me decide what my new boyfriend's name should be. But it didn't work :( 

    I'm debating between Fitzwilliam, Magellan, and Jafar.

    Anyway, my aunt and uncle are most generously contributing to the easing of my load in college. Laptops are heavenly. Also, this means that where I go, Photoshop goes! 

     *jumpy claps* 

     On second thought...this could be a very bad thing. I can totally see myself editing the mess out of some brick wall while my philosophy professor rambles about Gandhi. I've always preferred brick walls to Gandhi.

    I've been reading this great book lately...talk about challenging and thought-provoking! Exactly what I've been searching for since I was told Crazy Love by Francis Chan was going to blow my mind. My mind never once felt even the slightest breeze. Tough? Yes. But true nonetheless.

     Radical is phenomenal! 

*Kimberly's Bucket List*
~ Go to Office Depot
~ Use "radical" and "phenomenal" in the same sentence
~ Become a missionary in some remote jungle where a click dialect thrives
~ Bake an \Oreo INSIDE a chocolate chip cookie
*and so on and so forth*

    It's all about being a radical follower of Jesus...not being content with religion...taking His words literally...giving up EVERYTHING for Him. 

     For His cause. For His kingdom. For His glory. 

     This should be a no-brainer for us Christians. Why would we hold back from God the very things He's given to us? None of it is truly ours. And even if we could somehow claim that...what could possibly be more important to us than the Forgiver of our sins? The Redeemer of our souls? The Savior Who took on our judgment?

    Think about it. 

   See what I mean? There are some things in life I treasure...but none more than my Jesus. But do we really live like He's the most important? Is He our priority? 
     In Matthew 13:44 Jesus said, “The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field." 


     If you found some great treasure...all non-materialism aside...would you go sell what you had to buy the field it was hidden in for much less than the cost of the treasure? I'll answer for you: Heck to the yes!


    But how many of us are willing to go sell everything we have for the Kingdom of God? For something we can't see but we "know" is there. We sure don't live our faith sometimes, eh? 


    See what I mean?! Thought. Provoking. 

     Go buy this book. And a snazzy new pen and a cool-colored highlighter. Then, when you're done reading it, let me know what you think. When I finish, I'm praying about using Radical Together by the same author for my girl's LIFT (Living In Fellowship Together) group. I'll let you know about that too ;)


    Well now, that wasn't so bad was it? *talking to herself* 


    You know, not in the least! I should do this more often! *answering herself*


     Yes you should! *realizes at this point, she should stop talking about this being heavily medicated jazz, and actually become heavily medicated*


     I'm praying that all you beauties have a great week! 

                                                                                              ~Kimberly