It’s amazing the things that can change in a few short
months. Looking back and reading my November post is…wow. The mistakes you
make, the friendships that disappear and the ones that deepen, the lessons you
learn, the things you regret but would never change…it’s a lot.
I guess I’ll start by apologizing to those of you who have
been promised pictures and updates on my two year adventure abroad. Because
that is not happening. You must be deeply saddened…I certainly am. But I’m
getting over it, I’d much rather be in the perfect and pleasing will of God. I
was looking forward to missionary school abroad (I still have every intention
of finding that hut to live in somewhere deep in the tropical forest with my
best friend and being involved in medical missions) but in my excitement and
thirst for adventure I think that the “ok” I felt I was getting was more me
thinking, “It’s missionary school.
How can that be wrong?” It’s not as though I planned on forsaking my clothing
and moving to the mountains to learn the teachings of a sacred donkey or
something. But alas, it’s not my time.
I realized this when
the day for applying was drawing near and I kept having the overwhelming urge
to throw up. That’s never a good thing, if you were wondering.
Anyway, I’ll be starting EMT classes this fall and I am
hoping that I’ve got it right this time. Because I am not so good at the whole
decision making thing.
The last six months have been filled with ended friendships,
sitting in random people’s driveway to take pictures of the sunset behind their
house (I believe this to be only fair, considering the fact that they’re living in my dream home, right?)
spiritual lows, reconnecting with old friends, a four-day trip to Dallas with
my childhood best friend to see our
childhood best friend, learning that
strength is sometimes the greatness weakness, realizing that I can’t remember
the rhyme to properly wish on a star (Which is totally absurd! My childhood is over!) and recognizing the incredible
beauty in diversity. Busy, busy!
As for taking pictures of the sunset…yeaaaaaah boy! They didn’t
turn out nearly as awesome as I had hoped, but I guess that happens sometimes.
I’ve been eyeing this house for years and words to describe the peace and
beauty and awe when the sun is setting behind that hill just don’t exist, so I
thought pictures might be better. But as it turns out, you just have to be
there. There are some things that you can’t capture in any other way than to
experience it. If you ever want to go watch it in person let me know and we’ll
drive up there together. What good is beauty if it’s not shared, eh? Until
then, you can use your imagination on these:
 |
| {adventure = contentment} |
Also, let’s talk about diversity. It’s freaking awesome, right?
A bunch of my co-workers got together to play flag football and I, not knowing
how to play and having no desire to learn, went and took pictures instead. God’s
creativity is inspiring. He made all of us so differently and so uniquely. It’s amazing how something you have the
opportunity to be part of everyday pops out at you through a camera lens. Aren’t
they beautiful?
My spiritual life has been low and high and in between and
pretty much all over the place. And it’s just…life. I let all the crazy busy
days get away from me and forget to make the most of everysecondofeveryday. I don’t want that anymore. I want to be so
aware of people’s hearts and people’s needs. I’m still trying to understand how
to be, “all things to all people.” It’s a daily, live in the Spirit kind of
thing.
A couple weeks ago I attended Engage, a worship/catch the
vision for your city event. Totally awesome.
To my left I noticed a girl in a gypsy skirt moving to the rhythm of the
Spirit. You could just sense her sweet heart and love for Jesus. During the
close Jimmy Needham belted out, “How Sweet it is to be Loved by You” and who
appeared to be her boyfriend pulled her up off her blanket and started swinging
her around. At first, I was totally in love with them. I thought, she’s found a gem. He kept swinging and
she kept tilting her head back while giggles exploded from deep within her
heart.
I’m not sure at what point I realized that he wasn’t looking
at her. But my heart just shattered. He was too busy looking around to see who
was watching his little show. Watching his dancing skills. And I just thought…I
don’t ever want to be that person.
I don’t want to be dancing with Jesus and not be looking
into His face. I don’t want to dance with Him so that people see…I want to
invite Jesus to dance with me because ilovehimmorethananything.
Because He’s my husband. Because He’s beautiful. Ahhh. I want to dance with Him in anticipation
for His coming. Practice for our wedding, when He comes to get me and we can
dance for eternity. <3
Maranatha. Come quickly, Lord.
Since it’s the fourth and since my Dallas trip deserves its
own post, I’ll be catching you up on that later. For now, just know that it was
totally uhhh-mazing. Happy 4th guys! Never take freedom for granted!
May the Lord make His face shine down upon you.
~Kimberly
